I did the stupidest today. My mother pissed me off so I did something horrible. I'm not going into details but let me just say I'm really fucked up. There are somethings you just can't take back. Tears are rolling down my face. I'm in soooo much pain right now. I just wish instead of my mom telling me to do more she could tell me to stop. Now I have to fake a smile for her birthday tomorrow. She says I don't under stand her pain because she needs a new hip, well she fucking wrong!!
Random advise:
Fellings can be gotten over.
People can be forgotten.
Problems can be solved,
but deep scars will last forever.
About Me
- EviltwinMK
- GB, Michigan, United States
- We all have our own story. We all have certain things we do that keep us sane. Those certain things that constitute as our sanities. Well these are my sanities. These are the sanities of a crazy person...
You're cutting yourself, aren't you? I don't see what the reason is for hiding it and not just coming out with it. It's very obvious by the title of the post... I'm not here to judge you, though. Actually, I'd like to help you...
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, you're not fucked up. You're looking for a way to either feel something or release aggression, and cutting is a means to do both. If you feel like it's the only way, then by all means go ahead. Just be careful...
It can help but it can also be very dangerous. Try sticking to your upper arms and forearms. First of all, they're the most easily hidden, especially at this time of year. Not to mention, there aren't a lot of major veins you have to worry about slicing. You'll bleed, no doubt, but your life won't be in danger.
If you don't want to continue on this path, and I try to talk people out of doing this type of thing, I would advise seeking some counseling. They try to help you, they really do... I just let it get to the point where I'm beyond help, but it may not be too late for you. You don't want to go through life mutilating your body.
I haven't seen a picture of you, but I'm sure you're a beautiful girl and you don't want to go through life having to hide scars. I very seldom go out without some sort of sleeves covering my arms. Summer, spring, winter, fall, I have to wear sleeves if I'm outside because I hate being gawked at by assholes that don't get why I'm all cut up.
Luckily I have a girlfriend that is understanding about all of this, but not everyone is... Most people will think you're some type of fucked up psychopath... Anyway, I hope this helps. If you want to talk, email me at deadtraumfrau@gmail.com